I’ve had an occasion to examine the merits of the proverb that says, "if the shoe fits, wear it." I’ve found that old saying to be incomplete and I'd like to correct that. To do it, let me tell you about shoes...women's shoes, that is. This will explain why the current meaning of this old adage needs to be amended.

Occasionally, my wife gets an urge to shop in Atlanta. She wants me to tag along to tote bundles and she throws in the prospect of seeing a show at the Fox Theater as an inducement. Sometimes I succumb to that artifice and sometimes I suggest she find a substitute woman shopper with a similar urge.

Recently, in preparation for one of these escapades she and another wife were going on, she had an Atlanta newspaper map showing the location of six shoe stores, all of which were convenient to reach according to the ad, and she wanted me to help her locate one.

"Look," she said, "these stores are selling famous brand shows for under twenty dollars! Imagine that. There must be one of these stores just off the Interstate. Tell me where I should get off."

I quickly discarded the first thought that entered my mind as to where she could get off, and the prospect of showing off my homing ability on a map paled at the vision of her and her confederate driving home with an overloaded trunk full of bargain shoes.

"Well," I answered, wishfully hoping she’d not find one, "just get off anywhere and when you find a bevy of women hustling each other along, you’ll have found a shoe store sale."

She snatched the map from my hand and snapped, "A big help you are! Don’t worry, I'll find one myself!" And I knew she would.

I don’t know what it is about women’s shoes that makes them believe you don’t have any unless there are four score and ten crammed into every closet niche. Is it because there is such little substance to them? A conspicuous heel attached to a piecrust sole and strapped to the foot with gossamer? Or maybe it’s because women’s shoes are not the protective coverings they once were and now are just color coordinates.

When I think of the price of women’s shoes that leave pennies change from a $100 bill and my wife claims those same shoes are on sale for under twenty, I guess I can consider myself lucky when she comes home with a couple of pair.